About this Blog

Since starting this blog last year I find that the purpose of doing this has changed, so I wanted just to take a minute to both re-organize my motivation for writing as well as make a bit clearer to the reader what to expect from this collection of posts.

Background

After graduating in 2011 and spending months in Washington DC searching for a job in the peacbuiIding field, I had the idea to rather go work the field to get the necessary ‘experience’ with which to build an awesome resume that would get me the awesome job I was pursing. Apparently 2 or 3 unpaid internships does not count as enough experience; age and life experience does not count for anything anymore and I also found the jobs were going to my 20 something classmates not the mid forties folk like me. Well young people can work longer hours without complaint, are more techno savvy and can be molded into the the NGO, company or government wants much easier than an older person with well formed attitudes. So rather than keep trying to fit into the mould I dusted off my backpack and took off in Dec 2011. I was determined to find out more about on the ground peacebuilding and volunteer in social work organization. I was even open to the possibility of starting a small organization in collaboration with local people, if there was a genuine need and if a situation could be improved.

Being Honest

Looking back on 2012 it was a year where I pushed and pushed to fulfill this goal. I was very fortunate to have master’s thesis published  ( http://www.amazon.com/Womens-Overcoming-Violence-Working-Kashmir/dp/3847344978/ref=sr_1_sc_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1356857599&sr=1-1-spell&keywords=women%27s+agency%3B+overcoming+cviolence+by+working+for+peace+in+Kashmir)    and also had the opportunity to work on and narrate an award winning documentary (http://youtu.be/eY20VzEpTSo). However, overall I did not make the contacts in the NGO world that I would have liked and being in Kashmir, which is a very broken and divided society and as a lone foreign female tourist was very difficult. I also felt that while my motivation was good I was not staying true to the Buddhist principles, I was not impressed with the functioning’s of the NGO world and was very disillusioned about the education system in the USA. Getting masters had not made me a better person; in fact I had witnessed how letters after ones name only serve to inflate the ego. I have also become disgusted at how materialism is effecting the world; i.e. encouraging individualism which in turn is causing the rapid break down of social fabric and respectful human interaction. So by October 2012 I was re-thinking my direction, again re-thinking my purpose in life.

Luckily I have been very fortunate in that the rent for property funds this journey. I live simply, stay in cheap accommodation, have no desire to go party or indulge in buying expensive clothes so being here has all worked out so far. Anyway thankfully the rent kept coming in on time and since I had no job and was in no rush to join the rat race in Washington DC, I decided to stay on in India. The focus has changed though and I am going back to what feel right for me; the study and practice of the Dharma and learning yoga, (well I will have to get a job at some point and peacebuilding was not cutting it, no matter how expensive the degree was and how hard I tried to get ‘experience’).

The funny thing is that the study and practice of the Dharma (Buddha’s teachings) is about being at peace; being responsible at the personal level for ones action’s and thoughts and for what one projects into the world. It was the study of Buddhism that made me want to get into peacebuilding in the first place and it has been the NGO peacebuilding world that has made me return to the Dharma and the practical, personal aspect of enacting peace.

Today

           This year is about going more inward, working on not pushing, working on de-stressing, working on being more aware of possibilities as well as limitations; also not working; being a human being not a human doing. Being honest with who and what I am, not projecting and pushing for an idea of what I think I am, what I thing I want or what I think I should do or be. Living in the way of the Buddha’s teachings, because only with being kinder to myself can I then in turn be of some help to others. Or as my dad said before I left Scotland this time; “If you’re pleasing yourself, then at least your pleasing one person”

In the Now
Therefore the  blog will be a combination of travel journal complete with information on places to stay and stuff to do; a look at society, culture, class and religion by introducing local people and their stories; information on yoga, meditation, spiritual and religious teachings with a focus on Buddhism; information on organization I learn about or volunteer at, and lastly my thoughts and reflections on this whole experience. Each post will have labels according to 1) place, 2) teachings, 3) volunteering and 4) reflections. Writing this is also a great excuse for me to play with attempts to write. I have never written a journal of any of my travels or experiences because I never felt I was good enough, had anything to say or that anyone would listen. Thank the Gods that middle age gets rid of all those fears about what others may think and loosens the tongue up to say what you think. However I also have to thank my mum, Rae for encouraging me to write, thanks also to Lesley Foster who has given me advice on writing from the heart without fear. Check out her writting workshop with Ink and Inquiry in Charlottesville at  

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Ink-Inquiry/548507128496570 

Thanks also to Katherine McNamara for her encouragement  and advice to write on line. Her editing company, Artist Proof Editions is at http://www.facebook.com/ArtistsProofEditions

I also hope to figure out how I can post your comments for all to see so as to open up conversation and really would like to get some feedback from you.

Also I have added a like it on Face book at the bottom of this page  so if you do please like it and lets see how many reader we can muster. Thank you to all

The Downside of Tourism.

Look beyond the fun and colorful face of this beach tourist town I often see things that makes me wonder if the influx of tourist money is all a good thing. For instance on the way home to the hut one evening I stopped to buy some mangoes from a small stall ran by a local husband and wife. This night however, the wife looked even more sad than usual. She weighed the mangoes but was trying to avoid stepping over something beneath the counter. I noticed that her eyes were puffy as if she had been crying. As I handed her the money her husband’s head popped up from underneath the counter; he had been out cold drunk on the floor of the shop and had just woken up. Without even seeing me, he started to shout at her and she held her head low as if in shame. He got up then staggered onto the chair where the money drawer was set up. As his back was turned, I made a face at him and asked her, through hand signals and expressions if he had been drinking? She nodded a yes, and started to cry. What has this women endured I wondered, was this a nightly event, him getting drunk on the days takings and abusing her. Did the verbal abuse stop there or did he beat her as well? How much of their meager income was he pissing against the wall as she worked hard? And how many kids did she have to worry about feeding that night and the next day since he had spent their money on booze. The biggest question though is, if tourist money was not flowing into Arambol would he have income to spend on alcohol? Did he drink like this before they set up their fruit stall, or was he always a drunk? All questions I do not know the answer to: all I could do was show her that I felt her pain and wished she did not to deal with this horrid situation. As she handed me my change I do not know what came over me but I took a step off the pavement and into her shop, put my arm around her and as I stroked her back, I felt her tears on my shoulder. She is only one of the many women I have seen in India who have to deal with drunk and abusive husbands and every time my heart breaks to see this. So how much money is enough  to help a family survive if a husband and father can’t control his urge to get drunk?

Home Sweet Home.

Cafe Del Mar, Arambol Beach.

Contact;  Mr Teo Lobo  at 9822 127887 for accommodations at his families beach huts. Prices ranges from 400 rupees to 600 rupees per night. Teo has two places one closer to town and the other further down the beach near the surf club. Accommodation is basic but very clean and Teo is very kind and helpful to all his customers.

Huts

Teo and family

the Totem  lads from Dharamkot

totem restaurant

The huts are right next to Totem restaurant which is ran by a group of guys from Dharamkot, in Himachal Pradesh. Totem has a great menu and is great vale for your rupee.  Call 7798313996 for more info on the restaurant and other accommodation in this are of Arambol. Totem show movies in the evening and the Russian clients even hold a kindergarten  in the restaurant garden. It is a fun place with  where the clients all know each other. Ajay who runs the restaurant is also in partnership with his brother who has a trekking company based Dharamkot, Dharamsala. They have also just opened a small guest house called the  Coniferlodge, so I will have to have a look at that place when I am up in the mountains,             http://www.himalayantrekandtours.com/

From the Tibetan book of the dead

I also loved the above writing on their counter, an excerpt from the Tibetan book of the dead.

Different zones for different folks; where do I fit

As I perform my daily ritual, walking from one end of the beach to another, I have noticed there are definite zones of the beach that attracts different people. However, I am not quite sure which zone I an average looking white lass like me fits into.

The end of the beach near the cliff with its techno/trance bars and restaurants seem to attract the shaved headed, tattooed, pierced, beautifully body sculpted but rather serious people. These alcohol drinking, meat eating folks who like to wear tight Che Guevara t-shirts and army, camouflage design baggy shorts. Unfortunately my lack of body art, wee bit of belly flab, longish hair and smile makes me an odd one out here. Next is the hippy drum circle zone. Here folks are dreadlocked, unshaven, patchouli smelling, wearing colored clothes, with long skirted women decorated with flowers in their hair. Needless to say lots of dope smoking goes on here, Bob Marley and Jim Morrison T-shirt are popular and many of the restaurants are vegetarian. If I let me hair loose, wear my rainbow colored bikini and sarong I can pass as one of the crowd but the lack of bulging eyes and spaced out look gives me away as an impostor. Then on to what I have dubbed no man’s land. This zone of the beach is where people just walk up and down on their way to one zone or another. Here, some people fly k and there are sometime surfers or body borders in the waves. Next to this is the ex-soviet union zone. Here is where the majority of Russian tourist live, so most people are blond, blue eyed and let their many kids run around naked. I have also spotted the odd nudist or very scantily clad sunbather hiding in the sand dunes.  The huts here are a bit more luxurious which reflect the fact that many Russian here have money. The yoga classes, menus and other signs are in Russian. Here my lack of blond hair gives me away and I feel over dressed in my conservative style bikini. Then last at the other end of the beach is the Indian zone where many Indian families have their annual holiday. In completer contrast to the Russian’s, the Indian parents keep their kids well covered. The wee boys, as well as the grown men use their underwear as swimsuits but the wee girls have to keep on their dresses as they play in the water ad make sandcastles. Indian mothers too wear their saris and clothes in the water so walking in this zone with a bikini is a cultural no no. So when in this zone, I wear my sarong on top of my bikini and with the Indian men starting at my white skin it is obvious I do not fit in this zone. The cultural diversity of Arambol is what makes it so fun, so I guess it does not really matter if or which zone I fit into, just happy to be here.

Lady of Mount Carmel Church

The Church Peace Wishing Peace Star

Christmas bush/tree

one of the many nativites

Tree on the beach

Home made stars

Roadside shrine to Mother  Mary 

Goan Christmas

I have so enjoyed seeing ho the Goan people celebrate Christmas with all its Catholic Portuguese heritage. Most house  have a home made nativity and Christmas tree/ bush by the front door of their house. Great care is taken into decorating just right and getting every detail of the nativity perfect. Paper stars that light up at night are the most popular decoration, they add a fairytale/ magical air to the coconut groves and village back streets. The Catholic Church here is just beautiful, complete with stain glass windows, gold painted alter and paintings of the life of Jesus adorning the walls.  I missed the midnight mass but did attend a part of the Christmas day service. The ladies came to church dressed in their best sequence and chiffon saris or bright coloured satin dresses and were dripping in gold jewelry. The men were dressed in pressed short sleeves shirts and trousers with hair combed perfectly. The children too were all dressed up and were on their best behaviour, with the help of the odd serious look or nudge from mum to stay still. Funny how some things are the same the world over. Anyway the elderly nun tended to the alter and the nativity scene and a sermon  was said in the local language. However while the priest was talking I had to leave for class but I am sure the church was the center of activity that day  as their were table set up outside serving refreshment after the service. Santa too has not been forgotten here, many of the decoration sport hi jolly face and I am told the children receive sweets from him on Christmas day. 

 Merry Christmas

Peace be on earth; for all beings

sending all of you a merry xmas

Sending out Christmas wishes of love, peace and kindness to all my Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Sikh, Jewish, Bahai, Buddhist, Jain, agnostic and athiest friends, as well as to folks I do not know.

Merry Christmas 2102

Christmas on the beach is just excellent. In this heat is feels like summer and watching the locals decorate the tropical bushes, not conifer trees is fun to watch. So to all  have a Merry Christmas, and happy anniversary of the birth of Jesus (whether it was the 25th of December or not, whether  it is a pagan holiday or not, or the materialistic craziness it has turned into, I like to remember the teaching of Jesus i.e. kindness and compassion  to our fellow man and woman with a big splash of morals and ethics). I feel so grateful to be here, even though miles away from family and friends there is no feeling of loneliness just a happy heart and lots of wishes for everyone and every being on this planet earth to find happiness, peacefulness and be that bit kinder to themselves and others around them. Love to all